superman + heckler = popcorn

Today I watched Superman Returns, which was a good movie. The only exceptions to this prevailing goodness were the moments tainted by the people behind us. Picture if you will, the opening moments. Text appears on the screen setting the scene. Suddenly from behind you, an idiot begins chuckling and reading the text LOUDLY. I’m sure many of you have been witness to a similar event. You know the type of people. Their with a group of friends, who apparently need to share their innane humor with the rest of us. Many of the people arround us voice their opinion of the culprit. The pleas of the unfortunate souls surrounding the jackasses do nothing to quite them. My own vehement protest, "shut the hell up you retarded monkeys" also fell on apparently deaf ears.

You may imagine that this is the rant of an impotent bystander. Cast away such thoughts, as the culprits bathed in the buttery goodness that is movie theater popcorn. The last straw came during the movie’s ending. A loud fart noise, some even louder caughing from the gallery of mentaly unequipped critics and suddenly a rage took me. Before I new it my hand was gripping the super sized soda, that we had been upsold. When the credits rolled my eyes met my fiance’s and we were off. The soda changed hands and I ended up with the sizable remainder of our super sized popcorn. We made a fast break for the only exit path and told my family to go on ahead. As they came down the stairs and down the walkway, they were met with greasy tastey vengance. The soda remained primed in my fiance’s hands, at the ready. The sorry group continued on with only a muffled fuck you in reply. The kernels fell tonight. Viva la revolucion!